Campaign poster

Since TenForKen have vanished without trace, we decided that TSS should lead a new effort to oust that troublesome scamp, Ken Bates from Elland Road.

Refreshingly, our approach offers a reasonable argument (sort of) as to why he should take on the bigger responsibility of Prime Minister (whilst conveniently, leaving Leeds in peace).

It wasn’t because we couldn’t think of a tenth (honest) but to further set us apart from the people of TenForKen, we also gave our list just NINE reasons! Clever, huh?

#9 - Ken Bates could build his hotel on the back of 10 Downing Street. A move that is bound to bring in more guests than his planned Meccano plans for Beeston.

#8 - Bates is not dissimilar to the current Prime Minister, and indeed his predecessor in that he’s already hated by the majority and is massively out of touch with the people.

#7 - A master of financial stability, Bates took Chelsea from the brink of extinction to… well, the brink of extinction. But Bates was already savvy in the art of ‘the bail out’ as he brought in a Russian Oil thug to take them off his hands (for a reasonable fee of course).

#6 - Without lifting a finger, Bates would already secure an instant vote winner in Yorkshire by finally getting the Chelsea out of Leeds.

#5 - A controversial point no doubt, but with Bates spending most of his time in Monaco, it would give the Deputy PM (Shaun Harvey) some time in the limelight. Through this entirely selfless act, Bates would be helping the next generation of politicians to develop into the unpopular, out-of-touch leaders they will one day become.

#4 - An excellent leader on the world stage, Bates’ most recent interview on Yorkshire Radio showed his foreign policy skills at there very best as he described half of the world’s football leagues as ‘little tinpot organisations’.

#3 - Notoriously tough on crime, Ken Bates once suggested enclosing rowdy football fans in terraces surrounded by an electric fence. Not the most popular of ideas at Chelsea, and later rejected by the FA, but his uncompromising attitude would send a shudder down the spine of every prisoner and would-be thug in the country.

#2 - Britain would never again be seen as America’s lap dog with Ken Bates in charge. With such controversial views, countries would be falling over themselves to save face and distance themselves from Great Britain.

#1 - The number one reason for voting Ken Bates to be the next Prime Minister lends from the old philosophy that ‘a problem shared, is a problem halved.’ In this case, it goes so much further than simply halving the problem, but by inflicting his unique brand of leadership on all of the UK, we will have successfully reduced this problem several-fold.

Picture by The Beaten Generation. List compiled with thanks to the #TwitterWhites.

21 Responses

  1. Jim Barnett

    Remind me, why do we hate Bates so much? I mean, yes, he’s quite controversial at times with his outspoken comments. Yes, tickets prices are too high, and yes, he’s probably making a quid or two out of the club. But aren’t we on a sound financial footing? Hasn’t he backed Grayson in the transfer market? Hasn’t he put in a sound business model at the club? And moreover, didn’t he (albeit through some strange method of ownership) take on the club, when nobody else would?

  2. Clive Sanderson

    I suppose most Leeds fans would prefer owners who never voice an opinion and are afraid to upset the self interested upper echelons of Football in the UK and Europe. And surely it would be better to have owners who have no real interest in football.

    While Bates is far from perfect, at least he says what he thinks and he has backed Grayson with what must be the biggest squad in the 2nd division.

  3. Anthony Lewis

    Would Bates even be eligible for PM? He spends half his time evading tax in Monaco doesn’t he? Couldn’t be much worse than the current crop if he did become PM tbf.

  4. TheReaper08

    @tony So do a lot of the current funders of modern political parties and there cronies.

  5. 5_QUID

    Instead of throwing away money building hotels and conference suites at Elland Road wouldn’t it make more sense to buy the ground back first. At the moment the money is being given to ???? (by the way does anyone know who?) We’ve lost the training facilities, and it will be bad enough losing Elland Road without spending a fortune improving it first.

  6. TheReaper08

    @TSS So ten for Ken has sunk without trace, I remember slating that for the total crap it was at the time only to receive some fairly negative comments.

    Oh well, right again…..

    • TSS

      @TheReaper08 @Colin

      I thought the questions were all reasonable enough, and that they were ones the fans were within their rights (as paying customers) to ask.

      Ken Bates’ refusal to answer them was pretty worrying really, because it was all pretty basic information that we could find out easily with other clubs.

      But anyway, this was a tongue-in-cheek post, so I’m going to bow out and avoid the politics of Leeds United today.

  7. Chareose

    for once i actually agree with Ken on Bradley Johnson…. and wouldnt we miss his rants if he went ??? lol

    I do wish he wouldnt air his dirty underpants in public though…..

  8. Adrian Taglietti

    I Have supported Leeds all my life, lived in London for 20 odd years, most of my friends support/ed Chelsea, i saw what he did to SB and his involvement with the new Wembley tells, certainly me..that the guy is a genius, without him we would be well and truly screwed,get over it,get supporting him or move on!!

  9. Mikelufc

    Spot on fella, he is a tw@t but he is our tw@t get a grip TSS
    I see you still cannot get to grips with the difference between there and their! You wouldn’t get a company car if you worked for me but I suppose the Hun don’t understand either!

    • TheReaper08

      @Mikelufc Sorry I missed this little jibe.

      I don’t need to know, I have people and software packages to take care of that for me. I ask you this, is it better to write something great with poor sentence construction and grammar, or write a load of old bollocks with absolute perfection ?

      As for the Hun, they employ me for my sharp mind and managerial ability. They pay me well and give me a brand new car every 4 months, thankfully I won’t need to be asking you for employment anytime soon !

  10. Jimmy1

    Gotta say, I love Big Ken. Our finances our sorted, he’s loyal to his managers and his signings are sound! We haven’t that this good a chairman since….errr….whoever was before Ridsdale!! Compare him to Ridsdale, Krasner, that Doctor bloke and all the rest and I think you’ll find him to be an intelligent and successful chairman! Yes, he may be very outspoken but the level of stabilty he’s brought to this club is surely worth it?!

  11. Dave Howson

    Controversy certainly follows KB about. But not long ago Leeds were on the brink of disaster, Today their finances appear to be in order and how many fans would have put Simon in charge ? The managers sound, the squads there to be built on, and lets face it realistically we needed to stay in the championship this season, and that looks good so far. – Kens a shrewd guy and Like him or loathe him hes done good for us.

  12. Andy (Rotherham)

    Ken Bates is a PR nightmare for the club, but overall, I beleive he has been good for the club. His business plans are what any decent club has to consider these days and just make common sense. I don’t always agree with his policies, far from it, but overall, he in charge of our club and is doing a decent job of turning the old ship around.
    we are Leeds !


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