The unnamed writer suggests that the former England striker could still command wages upwards of £50,000 per week, which is precisely where any Leeds United fan that has been around for the last seven years stopped reading and started rolling around on the floor in fits of uncontrollable laughter.

The worrying thing is that some Leeds United fans tend to buy into these nonsensical rumours and are currently setting themselves up for a huge fall when our starting line-up next season doesn’t feature the likes of Jermaine Beckford, Michael Owen and Joey Barton – all of these players are out of our price-range, and footballers seldom take pay-cuts to join what used to be a big (high-paying) club.

We’re a mid-table Championship club now with Ken Bates as our chairman – we need to keep things in perspective.

The problem is that these rumours quickly gain traction due to the incredible power of social media. The Yorkshire Post publish a ridiculously speculative piece, a few dozen tweet about it and within a couple of hours, it’s no a longer the “what if?” that the Yorkshire Post published, but a full scale rumour backed up by sightings of clandestine meetings allegedly held in highly public places.

What was initially “What if Leeds United gambled on a £50k-per-week injury-plagued former England striker” quickly becomes “Neil Warnock is chasing Michael Owen” and before you know it, someone has taken it upon themselves to start claiming that the deal will be completed by early next week. It’s Chinese whispers on speed.

Remember when I said I’d run around Elland Road naked if Patrick Viera signed? Well, if Michael Owen signs I’ll run the London marathon and donate every penny I make in sponsorship to Ken Bates. And just so you understand how serious I am, the only thing I hate more than unnecessary exercise is giving money to Ken Bates.

On a positive, and more importantly, realistic note, Neil Warnock has hinted at a move for Clint Hill should he decide to leave QPR when his current contract expires.

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But, being a ‘live and let live’ kind of guy, I decided it best not to urinate on too many bonfires and keep my proverbial mouth shut.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t resist the temptation any longer…

At this stage of the close season, our support is split between the ‘been there, done it, t-shirt already paid for’ variety whose perfectly honed defence mechanisms refuse to allow for optimism (that Ken Bates can later shatter) and their polar opposites – the perpetual optimists who will insist that “this time, it’s different…” (“..like last time?” The rest of us respond in unison…)

True, Neil Warnock made a strong start by snapping up Jason Pearce from doomed Portsmouth and if the rumour mill is to be believed, Joel Ward will follow suit. Both positive signings that should improve the squad.

Despite this, the alarm bells are already deafeningly loud. When Ken Bates isn’t telling us about every football agent in the entire world all going on holiday together at the same time, he’s explaining to us that we could have signed Jermaine Beckford but that would be a step-backwards – by which I can only assume he means, to a moderately successful team with a 30 goal per season hitman. Better make sure that Max Gradel doesn’t get any ideas about doing a u-turn as well then! Didn’t you just hate it when we knew how to win?

Every interview is littered with the same excuses we heard last season, so much so, that I was almost tempted to check back through The Square Ball archive to make sure Ken Bates wasn’t recycling his rants. Sure, Bradley Johnson’s name has been edited out and replaced with Adam Clayton and the East Stand project has become the West Stand project, but the rest is standard “lower your expectations” Bates.

There is some truth amongst the excuse-heavy rants, but it’s nothing to inspire the majority. For one thing, football players’ contracts always expire on June the 30th meaning the abundance of free agents Leeds United will be waiting to snap up are unlikely to arrive until early July.

Maybe the perpetually optimistic are right? I desperately hope they are, and it’s not totally unthinkable, is it? As the old saying goes, ‘even a broken clock is right twice a day’.

If only there was a sure-fire way to make us all believe that this time, it really is different. What if Leeds United managed to convince our key players that things are different this time? What if the likes of Robert Snodgrass signed a new contract that signalled his newly-discovered confidence in the clubs ambition? Preferably one without a get-out clause for when we fail (again).

It’s unlikely I know. After all, there’s the inevitable bid from Norwich City that our chairman will be unable to refuse, especially when Robert Snodgrass signals that he has no intentions of signing a new contract that is “the best the club can possibly offer”.

It could be the post-season depression sinking it, but it feels a lot more like deja vu. Club find it impossible to negotiate a new contract with a highly-rated midfielder – check. Excuse-ridden radio interviews with Mr. Chairman – check. Manager singing from same hymn sheet – check. More talk of building work than transfer targets – check. Club captain leaves after questioning the ambition of the club – halfway there… 

Chin up though, I’m sure Euro 2012 will give us something to cheer about…

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“Notice how in the count room nobody ever seems to see anything? Somehow, somebody’s always lookin’ the other way. Now, look at these guys. They look busy, right? They’re countin’ money. Who wants to bother them? I mean, God forbid they should make a mistake and forget to steal.” - Ace Rothstein, Casino (1995)

There’s even a casino in Las Vegas called the Monte Carlo, which – like Elland Road – has suffered severe fire damage in it’s recent history.

Of course, there are a couple of notable differences, like the weather and relative success for example. Vegas also knows how to treat it’s customers. The town may bleed you dry, but you’ll love every second of it. Leeds United could probably stand to learn from that.

But if it was at all possible to twin a football club with a city, Dirty Leeds and Sin City sounds like an ideal pairing to me.

It seems only fitting then that Leeds United should get it’s own casino. Details released via the official site outline plans for a two-storey structure bolted onto an extended West Stand. Somewhat reassuringly, the club say they have no intention of operating the casino themselves, but will instead seek out experts to run it for them. Why is that so reassuring? Because if there’s any football club capable of messing up a cash cow like a casino, it’s Leeds United.

Some fans have raised objections to the idea of a casino, mostly on the grounds of further funds being diverted away from the squad to facilitate yet another Ken Bates “vanity project”. Generally speaking, I’d agree. The vast majority of Leeds United’s income still comes from gate receipts despite our loveable chairman’s excessive spending on corporate facilities, bars and restaurants. And it’s a well-trodden path, despite the massive expense of Chelsea Village, the project returned very small sums of money for the club.

In short, such ventures are simply not worth the outlay to a football club. The sums of cash available from hotels and retail pales in comparison to what is available from gate receipts and sponsorship deals which only increase with the success of the team itself. Spend well on the squad and the return will absolutely dwarf any profits a hotel will make – and the income will increase year after year while ever the club can maintain success. A hotel and various retail establishments meanwhile will still be returning comparatively small sums of cash.

However, a casino is a different thing entirely. These things are built on such a vast scale, with an eye-watering potential for profit that anyone opposed to these plans really needs to have a rethink. Out-of-town leisure facilities are big business nowadays, and are generally very successful. Look at the Xscape complex in Castleford for example, everyone said they were mad when the plans for that were unveiled, but almost a decade on they continue to prove the doubters wrong.

The casino also makes the hotel a more interesting proposition. There are plenty of companies – including the one I work for – that would be considering such locations for management conferences. Elland Road already has conferencing facilities, but these events are tediously boring and since they can often stretch over the course of a few days, companies will consider nearby leisure and entertainment facilities a big plus when booking because it keeps their staff happy.

There are other bonuses too. In recent years, football clubs have become playthings for the uber-rich so one with a casino attached to it will sound even more attractive to the bored Arab Sheikhs and Russian gangsters of this world. Furthermore, the building of a casino shouldn’t have any real effect on Leeds United’s ability to build a competitive squad. Unlike corporate hospitality, bars, shops and restaurants, you’ll find no shortage of people happy to invest in a casino – it’s a guaranteed money-spinner.

The only real problem is an over-saturated market. Leeds already has four casinos that I’m aware of (The Grovesner, Napoleon’s, Gala and Alea) but it should be noted that Leeds United’s planning application is for a “super” casino, one which has a license for much bigger jackpots than it’s rivals. This should take care of the competition.

So there you have it. The Scratching Shed is pro-casino, pro-hotel (if the casino is built), and pro-conferencing facilities (if the casino and hotel are built). Pro-Bates? Let’s not get carried away…

“The end result of all the bright lights, and the comp trips, and all the champagne, and free hotel suites, and all the broads and all the booze. It’s all been arranged just for us to get your money” - Ace Rothstein, Casino (1995)  

Moreover players who wearily raised an eye from the treatment table as the retained lists were released.

We all know that our defence has been our Achilles heel, and whilst you might question whether Andy O’Brien and Alex Bruce were managed well under Grayson, you’d struggle to make a footballing case for keeping either of them, ditto O’Dea, Connolly and even latterly Paul Robinson. In summary those particular ships have sailed.

As Ken puts it in one of his wonderful extended metaphors, he wants no passengers. To extend that further then I guess we’re the HMS Bates, a ship it would be the equivalent of a Roman Galley, each man on board either an oarsman or someone cracking a whip, no space then on that galley for a reclining chaise longue at which Kennius Caesar could be fed grapes by one of his eunuchs.

I dont suppose he’d want a rebellious Kirk Douglas a la Spartacus amongst those heavily yoked slaves either, or anyone who wants paying the going rate. Bizarrely of course that galley will be pulling alongside it an enormous set of buoyant corporate boxes (constructed at enormous cost).. so no passengers at all eh Ken?..

It leaves the question – Whither Patrick Kisnorbo? Crocked nearly continuously since our promotion from League One, Kisnorbo has seemed a shadow of his former self since the Injury sustained at Millwall nearly two years ago now.  So why retain him?

I’d expected fully to have seen us cut our losses here, much as we did with Richard Naylor, but Warnock has perhaps given us some insights as to his decision. He cites the fact he tried to sign him for Palace at the same time we first came in for him, so clearly a player he rates. He even thinks he may play a part in pre-season. Clearly he rates the player, but when you hear Ken Bates talking about the aforementioned `passenger free’ squad you have to wonder where exactly both he and Warnock consider Kisnorbo to be?

A cheerleader a la Beckham at the 2010 World Cup? An inspirational figure in the dressing room on crutches? Personally I think he’s a real leader on the pitch, but if he is to be one of our now limited number of defenders I’d have to say I’d have preferred for those wages to be spent on a more `robust’ defender, but the transfer window is still young, and of course Jason Pearce has been unveiled, so some positive movement already – 1 out of the back 4 replaced anyway!

For the above – ditto Leigh Bromby. A ruptured Patella tendon – ouch –  to you and I the ligament connecting the kneecap to either your thigh or shin bone, one can fully understand how snapping such a major ligament required oxygen to be administered.

He too though is not available until `the new year’ at the earliest, begging the question why he too remains in the squad, he too like Kisnorbo has hardly been a stellar performer when he has returned, solid enough – but why?

We don’t all have to unanimously agree with the managers decisions but these seem the most baffling of all to me, I eagerly await the pro-Bates columnists take on these matters, no doubt Lorimer will tell us that they are like `new signings’ come next February when both are fit again.. He of course has already done a 180 degree switch from believing we had six capable centre backs – all quality – and some internationals, to telling us today that the squad was `too big’  and that a clearout was essential…I suppose unless you’re Simon Grayson eh? Do try to at least reference your own articles for some integrity Peter.

The other issue causing some concern, (and again the jurys out until we see the calibre and volume of new signings) revolves around the deployment of our youth team.

Thompson and Taylor are going to be loaned out Neil tells us. He also doesn’t feel our youth squad are on a par with say Palace in terms of kids ready to play in the first team, an alarming denouement, considering we were told our squad was to be a blend of new players and youth by Bates not long ago.

One things for sure, leaving the squad in its current decimated state is not an option, so we simply must bring in those new players, something we haven’t necessarily been the best at doing in recent seasons. Again the right noises are being made, and we’ve indeed seen that first signing today (Friday) but actions do speak louder than words in this context, and there is much to do.

Some tough decisions have already been made. But on balance it appears those are mainly the right ones, lets hope that level of decision making continues, and as for my particular whingeing, well you can’t please all of the people all of the time. Or, to put it another way there’s just no pleasing the `morons’.

For a player who has become a first team regular, with 43 league games under his belt this season and 6 goals and 5 assists to boot, he is not in keeping with the other dross on the transfer list: those fringe players (Nunez, O’Brien), forgettables (Connolly) and outright flops (Paynter and Rachubka).

Warnock responded to questioning as to why Clayton found himself on the transfer list in an interview yesterday evening, offering:

I’m looking to sign midfield players, and the contract Adam’s representatives were looking for, we weren’t prepared to go to that extent. Coming into the last year [of Clayton’s contract at Leeds United] it makes sense to see if they can get that offer somewhere else and if we can get an appropriate figure it’s the sort of money I can use to improve the squad … Adam has probably had more games than anyone else, but looking at that area I have my own ideas about players I’d like to bring in and that’s what I’m looking for really.

There are two different reasons mentioned in this interview as to why Clayton has been transfer listed. They are: one, a new contract has stumbled over wage levels, and two, Clayton is not the ideal player that Warnock wants for central midfield. But it is the latter which is more viable to influence Clayton’s inclusion on the transfer list.

Considering how much Clayton’s game has waned since Warnock’s arrival – in comparison to fellow central midfielder Michael Brown, who, when he remains on the pitch, has on occasions shown signs that he is a solid hard working midfielder and worth the punt of another season on ‘reduced’ wages – it is understandable that Warnock might want to try other recruits in central midfield. Who they are, and whether they are better than Clayton are arguments set for a later date…

What is more pressing in the here and now is the way Leeds United fans have jumped on the conclusion that Clayton is on the transfer list primarily because of his and/or his agents excessive wage demands, rather than where he fits in (or not as the case may be) with Warnock’s plans.

To be fair, Bates has led us down this path with an interview on Radio Bates immediately before the release of Wednesday afternoon’s hotly anticipated Schindler’s list of retained personnel.

To quote:

There is one individual whose agent has demanded £15,000 a week for him. That is £780,000 a year and with taxes, you are looking at nearly £900,000 a year, for a footballer in the championship. That is the equivalent of the gate receipts from four home games in a season. It is ridiculous, good luck to the guy if he gets it elsewhere.

For a club that doesn’t name names in transfer gossip, our Chairman sure likes to wave about unsubstantiated numbers.

Putting zero and zero together, Leeds fans quickly deduced the answer wasn’t four at all but Adam Clayton who was churlishly demanding the £15,000 a week. Taking Bates no-words at face value a stream of ire interrupted Clayton’s afternoon golfing session. Forcing him to respond via Twitter:

As my last retweet didn’t seem to make sense to many of you… I DIDN’T ask for 15k a week.

Before capping off a bad day at the office with a movie and a can or two of Carlsberg.

‘Is Clayton worth £15,000 a week?’ is one debate worth having. But it only holds any sense once Leeds United fans can agree on what constitutes a ‘decent’ wage for a first team regular at Leeds United whilst we are in the Championship.

To debate this is to restep into that dirty brown quagmire of Batesism, that whole paradigm of whether frugal management of the club’s finances is the only way to take this club forward v. the straw dog that is the recklessness of the Risdale years and ‘Living the Dream’.

Purposefully, an analogy exists with the current British political paradigm between the Coalition Government and the Labour opposition: either slash the public expense back in order to one day stop paying debt interest and maybe even balance the fiscal deficit v. maintain public provision as this takes up the slack of the private sector during the recession and maintains a level of growth that will at least service the country’s debts and keep people happier if in employment.

‘Why are you bringing all this politics McGuffan into Leeds United’s financial strategy?’ you may ask. Well, because that’s exactly what Ken is doing in order to justify paying a low-end Championship wage to our squad members.

In returning to Ken’s Yorkshire Radio interview about the unnamed player’s unnamed agent demanding exactly £15,000 per week, Bates followed on to say:

All the chairmen I have been speaking too in the last few months are all cutting back. As we point out, there is a recession and we have the fans writing in to complain about the pricing. It seems that player’s agents seem to think they are immune.

Laughable as it may be that a millionaire tax-exile such as Ken Bates feels for the plight of the common man in this time of great austerity, with player’s agent being this weeks stand-in for fatcat bankers, you will have noticed that for all the talk of ‘cutting back’, season tickets have not been reduced, nor the subscription to LUTV, nor the price of a new Leeds top…

The language of cutbacks has been hot on Ken’s lips since just before the January transfer window. Back then he wanted to cut back the wage bill and more urgently the number of players in the squad. From another Yorkshire Radio mouthpiece of 14^th December 2011, Bates answers the question he’d asked Ben Fry to ask him as follows:

We have a very large squad by even Premiership standards. We always used to say two players for every position and an extra one for the goalkeeper. That’s 23. Now we have 28, 29.

Roll on five months and the cutbacks strike again. Yesterday, Bates concluded his Yorkshire Radio stint with:

We have a squad of 30, we intend to cut it to 21-22, and we intend to get value for money. Fans are entitled to it and it is all we can afford.

Depressing as the last sentiment sounds about ‘all we can afford’, however the swinging cuts works both ways. Less players equals higher wages if sourced from the same-sized wage pool. At least in theory!

Here’s the maths…

• Last season (2010-11) we spent £11.6m on wages. Add 4% inflation for what we can guess we spent this season (2011-12) and 4% again for our supposed wage budget next season (2012-13) and this figure becomes £12.55m. Now, take Bates and his desire of reducing the squad to 22 players and that works out as an average of just shy of £11,000 per week for each of those 22 players.
• Yes there are the kids to pay too, and they shouldn’t be spoilt on excessive wages, but also consider that we are – hopefully! – not going to be paying so many wages for a string of unwanted and unused loanees as we did in the 2010-12 seasons.
• Factor in also that there are lads in the current ‘retained’ squad who should be on considerably less than regular team players, and I’m thinking here of Cairns and Thompson as ‘unprovens’ and Bromby, Pugh, and Kisnorbo as ‘bit part squad members’. This only increases the amount of wages available for the first team key players such as Snodgrass and McCormack.

At which point you have to ask, is £15,000 per week that unreasonable a wage to demand for a player’s agent to START the opening rounds of a renewed contract negotiation?

You see, we aren’t even pushing out the boat when it comes to what we spend on wages in relation to turnover. As TimPM illustrated in an excellent article on The Scratching Shed, we only spend 35.6% of our turnover on wages. That is about half the amount (% not gross) of any other Championship club.

Are we being prudent here? Well, yes; but we are being far, far too prudent. Even UEFA’s guidelines states that clubs should aim for spending between 50-70% of their turnover on wages. At 35.6%, and with no debts to service, we are massively under-resourcing our wage options and thus offering a needless advantage to our competitors in the Championship to outbid us on wages offered to the players we are interest in.

Even if we only increased our wage bill from 35.6% to 50% of turnover that would allow us to pay 22 squad players each £15,400 per week. At which point you can see that paying Clayton £15,000 per week is perfectly possible. He would be on the average salary at the club, not the top wage. Only then is it possible to argue whether or not we want to pay him £15,000 per week.

So why won’t we pay him (or almost any other player at the club) £15,400 per week at Leeds United? The answer is of course ‘Ken’. And the clue is in the quote taken immediately before the January transfer window when we once more failed to sign anyone or note and eventually sacked our manager.

Prior to saying his intention was to reduce the squad size to 23, Bates led that idea by pointing out that our “wages bills are very, very high” and need to be cut. And that’s at our current level of only 35.6% of turnover, remember! Therefore it is clear that Bates interest in the squad size is purely about the total wages and not the wage level per player. Less players could mean higher wages for each. It could possibly mean a better calibre of player arriving at the club too. But it won’t. Hiding behind the veil of ‘hard times’ for all, Bates is solely interested in paying less and less for the same old same. The cull of players yesterday was not about improving the squad, it was predominately about lessening the wage bill. Once off the books do not expect the total amount of wages to be used on new recruits – regardless of whether the squad size come August is a slim 22 or a full fat 29-30 squad.

Simply put, accusing Clayton or his agent of greed in asking for £15,000 a week, or whoever it was in our squad (if at all) is once more detracting away from the real joke at our club, Ken Bates and his insistent on paying peanuts for wages and getting nothing but monkeys and the odd nutcracker. We should not be party to such a self-purposed individual as Ken Bates in hiding their self-serving actions behind what is truly a time of many individuals’ real financial hardship. Ken, if you want to slash and burn and pocket all our cash, then at the very least do it on the quiet through some dodgy tax haven scheme, but don’t tell us it is in OUR interest for which you purposefully disserve us.

The season has ended and Neil Warnock has finally been able to deal with Leeds’ uninspiring squad. The gaffer has held extensive talks with the Club’s board and has hammered out today’s “retained list”. 8 players have been released (including 3 we knew about – O’Dea, Parker, Vayrynen), and 6 have been told to find a new club.

The players released are United’s unused backup keeper Maik Taylor who is moving to Millwall after impressing there on loan, Danny Webber who scored against Leicester to end his two-year goal drought (he’ll sign for Hull and it’ll be like buses, mark my words!), Mikael Forssell, Lloyd Sam, and Alex Bruce.

Players who will be actively hawked to other clubs are Paul Rachubka, Billy Paynter, Paul Connolly, Andy O’Brien, Ramon Nunez and Adam Clayton.

Meanwhile, Leeds have offered new contracts to Aidy White, Ross McCormack, Tom Lees and Zac Thompson while Snodgrass’ offer still stands. Michael Brown has also been offered a new ‘reduced’ one-year deal.

Presuming the transfer listed leave and all others stay, Leeds’ squad pre-signings put into an artificial tick-box looks like this:

Keeper:

Andy Lonergan

Defence:

Tom Lees, Leigh Bromby, Patrick Kisnorbo, Charlie Taylor

Midfield:

Danny Paugh, Zac Thompson, Robbie Rogers, Robert Snodgrass

Forwards:

Ross McCormack, Luciano Becchio, Davide Somma

The real surprise is Adam Clayton. Earlier today the Club’s Chairman revealed that one player had asked for a £15,000 p/w wage which he says would equate to four home match attendences. Clayton’s agent claimed to YEP’s Phil Hay that there were two rounds of contract talks with Warnock, but the two sides weren’t close enough for a formal contract offer.

We should remember, though, that there’s no guarantee that Clayton’s asked for £15,000 p/w. It could be any player in negotiations. One thing is for sure, putting a lad with potential up for sale like Clayton is a marker for the club’s ambitions. In the ideal world Neil Warnock might have preffered to have kept him, but the important thing now is that if Clayton doesn’t lower his demands the club have to replace him properly.

Fans have always been quick to justify the decision to sell the likes of Bradley Johnson, Neil Kilkenny, Kasper Schmeichel, or Jonny Howson. And to hear how some of us talked about Jermaine Beckford you’d think he was a Michael Ricketts mk II. We all know afterwards how important they were to the squad. It’s arguable whether we replaced any of those lads with similar quality so we should be sure of our pulling power before too eagerly damning Clayton and his greedy agent. Personally, though, if it is Clayton who asked for £15,000 p/w I’m not sure he’s being that realistic.

Transfer listing players doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll leave. Warnock warned:

If we don’t get the offers in we think are acceptable they’ll come back pre-season and fight for their place.

Replacements

Who will Leeds bring in? The unholy trinity of Jonathan Woodgate, Lee Bowyer, and Callum Myth have been linked with us by a few as usual.

Jonathan Woodgate fell short of his clause for a contract extension at Stoke, Lee Bowyer has been released as Ipswich look to younger options, while Callum Myth seems to of resigned himself to a coaching role with Newcastle’s academy after being overlooked for a place in their Premier League squad for the same reason as Bowyer.

It’s almost nailed on that Portsmouth’s player of the year Jason Pearce will be Leeds’ first Summer signing for a six-figure sum. We have supposedly beaten Norwich to the lad’s signature… Are we still Norwich City’s feeder club?

Meanwhile links with El-Hadji ‘The Camel’ Diouf are still strong. When asked on TalkSport if he would be signing the wayward winger, Neil Warnock claimed the line was breaking up and hung up – the last time he did this was on speculation linking the manager to Leeds.

Asked about the links, Diouf said:

‘I know people have talked about the incident between me and Neil Warnock but it is in the past and is not an issue. I have the utmost respect for Neil Warnock and I’d be delighted to help Leeds gain promotion to the Premier League.’

And insisted his bust-up with Becchio would not hurt squad harmony:

Becchio is a good, intelligent player. I’m sure he and I could link up well at Leeds. It would be ideal for me.

I reckon that one’s nailed on, too…

Meanwhile Jason Beckford is still being linked with a Leeds return. The striker was fantastic for us in League One, and enjoyed his Elland Road homecoming, blowing kisses, saluting, signing autographs and hugging every Leeds player he could find. It’d take a massive pay-cut for Beckford to be a realistic target, surely?

Meanwhile, the Club has decided on the back of the U18s fantastic run this season that seven youngsters deserve a professional contract. Congratulations to Nathan and Lewis Turner who have been awarded contract extensions, and to Sam Byram, Ross Killock, Simon Lenighan, Charlie Clamp and Dominic Poleon who have all turned pro.

We’re not Liverpool. This may sound obvious, but it’s possible we need reminding sometimes.

When it comes to the ability to live in the past, we do share traits. But come on, despite our respective current predicaments, we won the top division more recently, and we haven’t resorted to getting Wilko back. Yet. Their tendency to hark back to the majesty of their club’s prized dinosaur bones is beyond parody, and we shouldn’t be aiming to compete.

So all this Alan Smith/ Lee Bowyer/ AN Other former star chat that sparks up around this time every year has got to stop. Personally, I’d have El-Hadji Diouf over any ‘returning son.’ Frankly, it’s got less chance of ending in tears – and that, friends, is saying something.

Point to the recent success of Ian Harte if you wish, but you’re royally kidding yourself if you think that his performances after a return to Elland Road would have been anything like those when playing for a bunch of Waitrose-sponsored family-friendly dispassionates. Here he’d have been the New Stephen Crainey™ with added painful personal connection.

We even saw with Delph this season that digging up recent history isn’t advisable either. Not quite fit, probably mentally damaged by the debasing negativity of McLeish, he was a shadow of what we’d seen previously, and then his legs crumbled to dust as if he’s in training to be an Alan Smith impersonator.

There comes a time when you have to accept that you’re not going to dig up a Pterosaur or the remains of a little-known early human civilisation and make a name for yourself – it’s just going to be those glorified snails they sell in Whitby gift shops again and again.

Solid links with the likes of Pearce and Keogh (not Andy) are encouraging – players on the up who may, just may, want to play for Leeds to stretch themselves rather than some perverted sentiment or sense of duty. Given our current transfer allowance, it would be worth noting that these types of guys also tend to command lower wages while being better at football than the dinosaur on the down.

It’s undeniably hard for our egos to take, but there comes a point where you have to get off your big club high horse and accept the Norwich City model for promotion and consolidation was and is the right one.

More generally, it’s the fixation on ‘Premier League Quality’ at this level that will most likely find you with a decrepit crumbled excrement of a former big beast on your books. In the Championship, we’re not alone in falling into this trap – Ipswich for one are another massive sucker, viz. Kieron Dyer’s inglorious return to Portman Road.

Now is the time for the young and hungry of the present, found in less glamorous spots but vigorously looking for improvement. The majority around us are quickly learning this, and we can’t risk finding ourselves behind the Watfords of the world.

But of course some fossils are much deeper ingrained in the mud of our collective psyche and thus harder to abandon than MK Dons loanees – the likes of Messrs Gray and Lorimer.

Whatever the sentiment, though, engineering the captivity of dinosaurs for personal reasons is unethical, and they’ve surely been tarnished enough via the temptation of a regular pay check now. Watching Youtube clips of the club’s finest hours on repeat is acceptably retro – keeping the stars of those clips around as a party line Punch and Judy is not.

They should be given a healthy pay-off and set free, fresh with anecdotes about the Leeds doom years that will no doubt broaden their appeal to the haters as well as the lovers of the club, ensuring status as after-dinner circuit goldmines. There’s a world beyond Ken’s wallet.

It’s time to throw away the geological hammer and chisel, field lenses and ambitions of reviving the archaeological dig format on terrestrial television – it’s time to live in the now, Leeds.

The Leeds United skipper was offered a new contract three weeks ago and has spoke little about the situation since.

This news could be interpreted as Snodgrass planning a move away from Elland Road. On the face of it, there is little reason to sit down and discuss the situation with his family if nothing is about to change.

It’s also worth taking into consideration Leeds United’s comments that the new contract offer would make Robert Snodgrass “the highest paid player at the club” and that they couldn’t go any higher. The more cynical fans amongst us have suggested this was merely the club pre-empting a backlash by diverting blame onto the player.

Robert Snodgrass recently admitted disappointment at the sale of Jonathan Howson, and questioned the clubs ambition saying that promises have been broken.

Elsewhere, El Hadji Diouf continues to dominate the headlines, telling the Daily Mail that he’s interested in a move to Elland Road. The former Doncaster Rovers striker thinks he would be the ideal strike partner for Luciano Becchio.

Finally, Leeds United fans are anxiously awaiting word of the clubs first “summer” signing. Neil Warnock previously stated that he hoped to confirm a new arrival during the first week of May. The most likely candidate is Jason Pearce after Portsmouth confirmed a deal was already in place for him leave.

What happened to our fortress? What happened to our pride? We let our guard down and the fort has been breached. Perhaps it happened last summer when our greatest defensive wall, the imposing East stand, was temporarily deconstructed to allow for the installation of executive boxes. Perhaps then was the time that our enemies penetrated our bastion and set up camp within. Whenever they entered, I’m sure they’re appreciating the excellent facilities that the East stand now has on offer…

As gloomy and depressing showers descended upon our once great citadel (forcing the floodlights into a ridiculously early appearance at 2pm in the afternoon), Neil Warnock’s team seemed determined to end the season on an equally gloomy and disheartening note – and they succeeded. Leicester’s teenage debutant Harry Panayiotou touched home an injury-time winner to officially confirm season 2011/2012 as the worst home campaign in Leeds United history.

It must be noted that of the eleven home defeats just five occurred during the first fourteen matches, before the ‘dispensing’ of Simon Grayson. Of those five losses, one was a narrow early-season defeat with 9 men (against Middlesbrough) and one was a single-goal reverse against champions Reading. The embarrassing 5-0 and 4-1 scorelines did, at least, come at the hands of play-off qualifiers Blackpool and Birmingham respectively. The loss to South Yorkshire minnows Barnsley was inexcusable.

Since Bates, Harvey et al declared that a new manager would ‘get the best out of the current squad’, the Elland Road faithful have endured six defeats in nine matches. This included the record breaking match against Nottingham Forest (a night when Leeds shipped seven goals for the first time ever at home) and dismal performances against Brighton, Derby, Watford and Leicester. I am of the opinion, as are many others, that a bottom-half final league position would not have occurred if Grayson was still in charge. Nevertheless, Neil Warnock has the task of rebuilding our fortress and even the ancient Egyptians would agree that he’s probably the best man to take on this particular construction project.

Today’s starting line-up was less experimental than recent weeks and was largely dictated by injuries and suspensions. Paul Robinson missed out due to injury and is unlikely to be seen again with Warnock stating his intention not to sign the Bolton left-back. Danny Pugh filled in for him today, with Zac Thompson earning another start in the centre of midfield alongside Adam Clayton and Michael Brown. The Foxes’ starting line-up was notable for the inclusion of Elland Road hero Jermaine Beckford, who received a warm reception from the Kop and reciprocated by saluting the crowd as chants pertaining to a certain match at Old Trafford rang through the rafters.

The match began in encouraging fashion, with Leeds’ best players (Ross McCormack, Robert Snodgrass and Luciano Becchio) threatening to inspire a rare home victory. Captain Snodgrass had an early chance well saved by the pantomime villain for the day, Kasper Schmeichel. Soon after, Becchio fashioned a chance, only to chip the ball into Schmeichel’s hands. That was about as good as it got, as the match (like the rain) descended into a sloppy, uninspiring affair.

When the manager releases his long-awaited and much-anticipated list of retained squad members on Wednesday it is likely to be heavier in attacking players than defensive ones, and with good reason. Leeds’ season-long defensive frailties reared their head once last time as Danny Pugh pitifully lost the ball to Martyn Waghorn, who cut inside before slotting the ball into the bottom corner to give Leicester a first half lead after thirty-nine minutes.

All the quality of McCormack and Snodgrass on the wings was being equalled by the sheer lack of quality of full-backs Pugh and Connelly. An educated guess would suggest that two new full-backs are top of Warnock’s wish-list.

The second half was largely uninspiring and was not enlivened by the introduction from the bench of Danny Webber and Mikael Forssell, who were both woeful and perhaps are already aware of their absence from the ‘retained list’.

Spirits were raised amongst the twenty-five thousand crowd with eight minutes remaining as a good move resulted in Snodgrass flicking the ball past Schmeichel, with Webber tapping into an empty net from inside the six-yard box (his first, and most likely his last, goal for Leeds United).

With the prospect of a late victory to finish the season and new found optimism of avoiding the unwanted record defeat, the home crowd roared on the players to push for a second goal. Adam Clayton worked his way round the Leicester defence, but his cut-back was intercepted. Another late attack ended as Forssell overran the ball.

As the season entered injury-time for the final occasion, a 1-1 draw was on the cards – a result that would have fairly reflected a hard-fought, low-quality dead rubber. However, as if to hammer a final nail into the coffin of a season to forget, the Foxes produced a late winner as Panayiotou (seemingly offside) deflected the ball beyond Andy Lonergan.

At the final whistle, the fans flooded for the exits. There was no traditional end-of-season pitch invasion, nor did that many people remain for the customary lap of honour. The season was finally, finally over and the masses craved the opium of saying goodbye to the fallen fortress as soon as humanly possible.

They came. They saw. They conquered. And, as is now predictable for a Leeds home display, not much of a battle was fought.

There was only pride to play for today. And we lost.

Q: You’re almost there, one game to go.

I’m relieved if I’m honest. I don’t think it could have been much better so it’s time to move on. We’ve been planning now for a number of weeks. Although I’ve had a few letters I must admit, about my comments about ‘the end of the season can’t come quick enough’ and ‘roll on next season’, asking for their money back for this year. One guy wanting £50 back because he lost his bet with a mate at Burnley and it’s my fault we didn’t finish above them!

But I’m afraid I’ve got to stand for that. Long term we’ve got to plan for next season. It’s my one opportunity and I want to put a team out that the new generation of Leeds United fans can enjoy watching. We’re on the anniversery of them winning the old First Division and quite honestly the youngsters of today haven’t seen a lot of that so that’s my intention to try to build a side that the young generation can be proud of. Because we all know the history of the club and the ex players around the club are there all the time to remind you of that tradition.

So that’s the challenge in the summer: to build a club with the right kind of signing that kids can come to the ground excited to see next year, and we can give them a good run for their money.

Q: Do you think in a way this was an opportunity missed?

I think it shows you the level of the Championship this year really. I think if we had anything about ourselves we could’ve got in the playoffs but I think we would’ve been smudging the picture and I don’t think we were anywhere near good enough to be in the playoffs, and I suppose I’ll get caned for saying that as well.

Q: But it’s the reality isn’t it?

Yeah, I wouldn’t be here really if there wasn’t something that needed doing and I think it’ll be as tough as I’ve ever had because I feel we need an influx of players to give us the base for success. We’re playing Leicester tomorrow and they’ve thrown £17m at it I think and they’re not even in the playoffs. So the expectations of both clubs are big. It’s slight different because we have such a big fanbase we expect more, but when you spend that sort of money I think the expectation is far greater because you’ve got to come up with the answers when you’ve spent so much. I think it shows with Sven. As much as he’s tried, I think the Championship’s a unique league and I’m sure Nigel next year will have his own squad and will be a lot more prudent than Sven and I think they’ll be a more difficult side to play against next season.

Q: There’s a record to avoid for Saturday which is home defeats for the season. Is that something you’re aware of?

Yeah I’ve been told that. Quite honestly there’s nothing I can do about it. If I get beaten and have got that record I’ll have to start fishing in Cornwall and remember all these periods won’t I! But I don’t think about that – I’m only thinking about building a team. Yes, you don’t want records but at the end of the season you finish where you deserve to be and that’s how I see football. You can have bad luck here or there, but usually you finish where you should be and we haven’t been good enough in that respect. You don’t want negative records, but it’s the manner of some of the defeats that have upset me. But also some of them have been very good like the Southampton match.

It’s onwards now. We’ve got to look forward. We are working behind the scenes and I would like to bring players in sooner rather than later, rather than leave everything until the summer, because of the changes I want. We’ll probably make the retain list next week, Wednesday, and then the fans will have more of an idea what my thoughts are. And then recruitment will be important – with the Bosmans we might not be able to announce them until July, but we might be able to.

I’d like to keep the fans informed as much as I can about the summer activities but we’re going to get speculation throughout the summer and probably the best thing to do for me is to keep my own counsel on speculation. It’s difficult for journalists with the summer because some mornings you wake up with nothing to write and you have to make something up and your sources always come up with the trumps!

Q: I’ll put one to you. In talks with El Hadji Diouf can you confirm or deny?

No I can’t do either, no. And I won’t be doing either. I’ve read I’ve already signed 3 players from QPR, and El Hadji Diouf, and two others yesterday as well. So I think what I’m going to do is just bite my tongue and at the appropriate time when we do sign somebody the fans and yourselves will be the first to know. I think I’ve got to do that because I am going to be linked and while there are good journalists there are some journalists who don’t let the facts get in the way of a good story.

Q: You said you’ve got one lined up for after the season have you other targets lined up?

Yes, I’ve made quite a lot of enquiries this week. It’s been a busy week, talking to agents unfortunately – not my happiest time of the season! But you’ve got to do that.

I know the type of player I’m looking for, I know the opportunities I’m going to get and I know other clubs who are chasing similar types of players so I’m hoping we can get as many of our targets as we can really and get a certain type of player into the club. I think with Leeds and it’s supporters you have to have that type of player. It’s alright trying to bring the odd one in, that’s quite straight forward, but I do think we need quite an influx of new players so as I said when I came I think it’s as difficult as I envisaged, in fact probably more difficult than I envisaged when I actually agreed to come.

But the shining light has been the fans. We get beat and they chant my name, now there can’t be better support than that and that goes a long way with me with the way that I want to tackle the job and the enthusiasm that you’ve got to have to change things. I think the average supporter knows we do need change and I think that’s why they’ve given me their support.

Q: Contracts, Aidy White and Robert Snodgrass in particular…

Yeah there’s three or four lads… I’ll be doing the retain list Wednesday. It’ll probably be the following week when I get back to contracts – I’ve really had too much on with recruitment this week. I’ve put my priorities forward there. The lads know the offers that they’ve got. I’ve got to speak to Ross’ people – I’ve not been able to formalise an offer to Ross but that will be coming this week, and the other lads have had theirs, so I’ll be talking to them. Realistically we want to offer the players decent contracts and if I believe they are and they turn them down then we’ll have to look at it a different way. But at the moment I’m optimistic. But you know… football never fails to surprise me!

Q: Have you decided what to do about Paul Robinson?

I’ll talk to Paul at the end of the season. I’ll probably have a Thursday press conference and you’ll know more about everything then.