The Mangle

  Bear with me on the metaphor. The ugly wife in question is the crap footballer on your team’s books. You’d quite like them to stray to be honest, but if never is a little strong, they’re pretty...

About six weeks or so ago I considered writing a piece about whether we should assume a point has passed where we’re never going to be back in the ‘big time’ again, and just accept some sort of joyous...

You know what I said in my first column about us going up as f***ing champions? Well yeah, it’s still pretty ridiculous, but, well, you know… What’s for certain is we’re certainly doing the good side...

Damn – why’d we have to go and look like a vaguely convincing defensive unit? Clean sheet? Pah. Don’t they know it’s only going to strengthen ‘Mr Chairman’s position? Tw*ts, the lot of ‘em....

So now the dust has settled…what on earth WAS that? Having personally never witnessed such a swift descent from dominance to capitulation, albeit with a slight spoonful of sugar spiking the bitter medicine...

We’re going to get relegated. We’ll be up there come May. Grayson: one the finest young managers in England. Grayson: out. White’s the latest in a long line of starlets going to the top. White’s...

Let’s get this out of the way: we’re not the most forgiving bunch, are we? We expect pretty big things from the ‘Premier League Quality™’ that Simon and the Propagandists keep banging on about, and...

Dear Judas, No, that’s just the bitterness talking. Forgive me, Max, as we forgave you for the one-man insanity exhibition in the must-win game. Just why Max, why? Why now, when we’ve so few points and...

We love our White Knights, we do. We’ve had sh*tloads of the buggers, from cipher-like Sheikhs to Sainsbury’s Local, hell, even the Don’s son had his moment in the fading Beeston sun. And they love us...

On Saturday, at some point during that, it hit me. Out of shape, confused-looking coaches, staring into nothing like the jock dad trying to take in their highly uncoordinated kid falling in a sack-based...