Ever thought Simon Grayson’s press conferences seem somewhat repetitive? Almost like he’s reading from a script you could say.

Saying something without actually saying anything at all is a difficult skill to master. One slip of the tongue and Simon Grayson may accidentally tell the fans something interesting for once! And the consequences of that could be fatal – supporters may actually start to think they have a right to know what’s going on at the club. You idiots.

Well, posters on the ever-popular WACCOE forum may have uncovered how Simon Grayson manages to fill so many minutes of an interview with noise without actually saying anything. He’s even made a little game of it for personal amusement.

Thom Kirwin: “Now, for the latest news regarding Leeds United’s potential transfers we’re joined by Simon Grayson for another enlightening glimpse into the goings on around Elland Road. Eyes down, and we’ll begin…”

“We start with news that Alexei Eremenko is a potential target. What are your thoughts on him?”

SG: “All I can say at this time Thom, is there’s lots of players that would like to play for our club [B3] but it’s got to be for the right reasons [C2].”

TK: “Very interesting indeed. And how about reports that you’re looking to bring Coventry City captain, Sammy Clingan to the club?”

SG: “I’m not going to comment on rumours, all I’ll say is that we’ll only bring in players who will improve us [A3], we’re working hard behind the scenes to make things happen [A2] but as always we won’t be held to ransom [C3]

TK: “Two new arrivals so far which I know you’re pretty pleased with. Are we any closer to seeing more names added to the squad?”

SG: “Well Thom, I am very pleased indeed with the new additions and we want to kick on from here [C1]. We’ve got irons in the fire all the time [B1] but if we’re unsuccessful and those deals fall through for whatever reason then we’re not afraid to use the loan market [A1}. You can rest assured that we never stop looking for ways to stengthen [B2]

TK: “As always, it’s been a pleasure speaking to you.”

Thanks go out to whoever posted the above on WACCOE. 

  • Dje

    Class.

    As addictive as seeing if Eddie Gray can go a full sentence without drolling out a ‘yer know’.

    • Craig

      Don’t start me on that one. If I ever meet Alan “as much as anything” Green I’ll ring his neck.

  • Craig

    I think Noughts beats Crosses in the fictional scenario above TSS. Next time I’ll choose Noughts and go first.

  • Ramblinjohn

    You may have a point in one way but the KEY reason Grayson doesn’t say much is that it might eff up negotiations, raise someone’s price, alert other clubs…so I wouldn’t knock him too much…obviously there’s a lot that supporters don’t get told that they should but I think we’re better off in this sense not knowing till it’s done…that is, if we bloody do sign anybody else ever!

  • Ramblinjohn

    By the way @Dje – you might be right re Eddie Gray’s ‘yer knows’ but I think that technically counts as blasphemy mate.

    • Dje

      Lol. True.

      I’ve a lot of time for Eddie Grey’s opinion on the radio and in the press. He walks a good line between being responsive without being overreactive, optimistic without being complacent. I wish more Leeds fans followed him in that regard.

      • michael horspool

        i agree i love eddie grays comments but i get a different feel which i find funny. i think he is harsh and always talks about players in a ‘what are they doing, i would of done that’ and ‘they would not of got with in a mile of the team sheet back in my day’ everyone loves a cynical jock and he was true class. when you was as good as him you can be a bit condasending. love it

  • Rex

    Poor guy can’t do right for doing wrong. He must be the reason we are doing so badly lately.

    • TSS

      I’m not complaining about his ability as manager – he’s proved to be more than capable in that sense. Just poking fun at his interviews.

      I seem to remember that early in his Leeds United career he was on a Sky football show and revealed how the staff bet him he couldn’t fit certain words and clichés into his press conferences – I think this is how that game evolved.

  • Simon never gives anything away when he is being interviewed because there is nothing going on and never will be with our greedy chairman at the helm , its the same in every transfer window, they keep the fans hoping and praying and in the end up let us down. we will not get anyone else in because we will not spend any money. We will have to get used to this mediocrity because our board is mediocre

  • Rex

    FUN ! Being a Leeds fan isn’t about fun. It’s about pain, suffering and angst!

    Fair point though and quite amusing. As a fan of almost 50 years I am quite amazed by the virulent anti-Grayson posts (mostly on YEP).

    The club is moving in the righ direction at last, and fans need to have some patience and faith. MOT

    • TSS

      Drives me insane too. Grayson has a win percentage higher than Revie (different league, obviously) yet fans still moan – it’s insane!

      Keeps holding your comments for moderation because the email address you’re using contains the word ‘pharmacy’ by the way – a lot of spam these days is foreign pharmaceutical companies, so it sets the spam detectors off.

    • Matthew

      And the fights, dont forget the fights outside ER. Kidding…

  • Peter T

    Other managers say they are interesting in various players
    We deserve to be treated as fans not sheep to be fleeced!

  • Paul South Wales

    Eddie’s yer knows really piss me off too, they were funny for a while, but someone please tell him. On that note, class guy

  • PeterV

    His after match interviews are the same after January week after week as each year we try to throw it away he exclaims he is frustrated and is at a loss to explain why the team didn’t do better -check it out.

    I suppose that says everything.

    I hope Simon proves me wrong, I hope Leeds get promotion, I fear neither will happen with obvious consequences.

    • Ramblinjohn

      I hope he proves you wrong too mate – have to find something else to complain about then

  • Rex

    Over my head mate. I work in a pharmacy and love Leeds.

    Keep up the good work. Probably the most sensible blog around. I’m all for questioning the motives behind ‘the establishment’, but some of the comments you read are amazing. nearly all the fans I meet at the games love Grayson and think he’s doing the business

    • michael horspool

      agree grayson is good and needs praise i ask a question could any of you do your jobs well with a boss like ken bates. it’s the equivelant of being a bus driver and keep having to give away good engines for free at the end of each route and not being able to get parts due to boss not willing to pay V.A.T i run a small company and reckon i put more into it than bates and i dont have thousand of fans throwing money at me with shirt sales and tickets every week, only probs with larry is he cant seem to find a decent defender other than that i rate him very highly. average players make good managers and good players make average managers. think of the dark days when mcalister was boss!

      and on the other note i love grayson’s interview they are a picture of diversity. Also check his lip turns just before a cliche comes out. pure class

  • EYLEEDS

    Anyone know who the un-named trialist is against Rochdale tonight? I’m hoping for Messi or Tevez but have a feeling I will be disappointed!

  • trueyorxman

    Who is the trialist playing right wing for us at rochdale?

    • benp

      Apparently confirmed as Alexandre Mendy on other forums after I got a bit excited at whisperings of it being Yaya Sanogo

      (if anyone is unsure of why Sanogo is exciting check out his international scoring record!)

      • michael horspool

        also check yaya out on sega football manager, he is one of the best strikers in the game and sega football manager never get it wrong, other top striker is…leigh griffiths. if i was a mamager i would use the game to help me scout…any clubs out there want to sign me up?

  • saltburnwhite

    Why do leeds united have to play these stupid little games with the fans , if you have 3 trialists bloody name all three or dont name any!!
    Anyway theres alot of rumours going around but from what i can tell it is possibly a number of players:
    eremenko
    herold goulon (blackburn)
    alexandre mendy (czech team)

    • Ramblinjohn

      Last picture I looked at Eremenko wasn’t six and a half foot and black so it wasn’t him last night…I’ve looked at the pix on the web and it looks like mendy – I was about 10 yds from him – guy looked alright

  • whitesczech

    At last some wry humour on a Leeds board, keep it going. As for Alexandre Mendy, I haven’t heard anything about him going to Leeds and I’m in touch with football here.
    But recently the Czech team is nothing to write home about.

  • saltburnwhite

    ALEX MENDY , TAKE A LOOK , HE LOOKS STRONG QUICK AND TRICKY

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_H6XvV2NGA&feature=related

    • michael horspool

      just like gradel..oh wait…that means gradel will…of F**K.

      mendy is like for like for gradel (if it was mendy) not as good a finisher and not as direct but good player, passes more and is not as greedy however dont expect him to get 18 from midfeild. looks like gradel is off and mendy (if it is) and nunez will have to step upto the plate. think lloyd samuel could be a good signing though?

    • michael horspool

      if that is the highlight reel we are in trouble! you know a highlight reel is bad when it gets boreing and has mistakes on it, he was very tall though maybe we are interested in him as a goalkeeper?

  • GMcG

    He’s not the most articulate is he? Listen to this three minutes of waffle about the ‘Twitter Ban’ that could have been said 20 seconds:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/14202079.stm

    Either way it all seems a bit of an over reaction to me and another example of us being in the news for the wrong reasons.

  • Camaac

    TSS as always, worth reading. Factual but always happy to have a cheeky dig. I think SG has his hands tied. We may be the best supported in the division but we we bust a few years back so we’re not the richest. I can see us trying to get up with a squad packed with loan signings and they aren’t available yet.

  • Loved them diamond floodlights

    Number 11 looked pretty good last night to me full of running tracked back won headers could pass long and short didn’t try take on the world just to impress happy to play a simple pass and plenty skill sign here sir we could do a lot worse! IMO

  • michael horspool

    also heard rumours from a very reliable source that the number 11 mystory trialist was in fact alan smith in disguise, a very good disguise by that i dont mean in the way he looked but rather he was quick, had skill, passes went to the right men and he didnt get injured or booked…in fact just been in touch with the players agent now and saw him after the game in a phone box getting changed out of his disguse and it definalty was smith

    (this might not be 100% correct but wanted to start smith roumour again as i am not completely bored of it yet!)

  • Irving08

    One can be articulate whilst saying nothing (eg this post).

  • skin

    Ken Bates makes Doug Ellis look like Roman Abramovic.

    What is Deadly Doug up to, wonder if he fancies taking us on!!